Siamese Twins
(Words sent from a dream)
There is this dream I have,
In the dream it is very hot and dry,
There is no water anywhere, all of the lakes and streams are dry,
It never rains. I am very thirsty and dry, there are insects everywhere, and they constantly attack me. I am out, walking, I walk, and I walk, and I walk some more, but no matter how hard I try I never move very far. It is very quiet in my dream, there are no children, there is no sound of children playing, the parks and the schools are always empty. I am always trying to find my home but I can not remember where I live, or how to get there. I search for you, my love, sometimes I think I see you but when I finally see the face of the woman I talk to, it is always someone else, not you. I look, and I look, and I look, but I can not find you, I can not remember your face or your smile, the sound of your voice or your words, I can not remember your eyes or your name. I am always lost; there is so much sorrow, so much sandiness and pain. In this dream I find a news paper, I look in the obituaries, but there are never any names, no one ever dies in this place. I am hungry but there is no food, my stomach arms and legs ache. I am tired but there is no where to sleep, no one ever rests or sleeps in this place, it is always noon, the clocks never change. I am sad and depressed; I feel like I am being punished, I try to be happy and positive; thinking that if I am, things will change. But things seem to get worse all the time. This dream seems to occur more frequently in time. I am always writing to you in this dream, I write you many love poems, but when I finish writing them the paper is always empty, the words disappear.
There is another dream I have,
the Siamese twin;
I understand now these dreams were born together,
they are connected two different bodies that share only one heart. In the twin dream I am always traveling to see you, my love, it is a cool summer evening, we walk together in a warm slow summer rain. There is great love and peace, we are holding hands, there is joy in your heart, and this brings great joy to my heart. When we are alone, I look into your eyes I see great love, deep love, true love and I know that I am home. We kiss and I can taste the wetness of your lips, we make love and I can feel the wetness between your legs, and my loneliness and thirst is gone. This second dream seems to occur less frequently in time. Today I found these words on the way to see you, in the second dream; they are words I wrote in the first dream. The words that disappear in one dream live in its twin. So I will send them to you, in the second dream. So you can find me in the first dream and bring me home. I realize today that one of these dreams will be my life, the other only a dream when I sleep, but I don't know witch one is real, I am confused. The first dream happens more and more, it is a place like hell, waiting for me. The second dream happens less and less, it is starting to disappear. I hope these words find their way to your heart, my love, before this dream is gone! I love you!
Paolo Campisi
